


You won't judge, you're just listening

by babyliss12



Series: We'll take it slow (and grow as we go) [1]
Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: But He Gets Better, Esteban is dumb, Featuring Lance and Esteban being soft, M/M, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Sergio being a useful teammate, US GP 2018, and Lawrence being a supportive father, deaf lance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:48:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27490717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babyliss12/pseuds/babyliss12
Summary: Set during the US GP 2018, Esteban sees an unfamiliar face in the garage and a misunderstanding occurs but it has a happy ending. After another misunderstanding.
Relationships: Esteban Ocon/Lance Stroll
Series: We'll take it slow (and grow as we go) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2014246
Comments: 8
Kudos: 47





	You won't judge, you're just listening

**Author's Note:**

> Full disclaimer - I'm not deaf, I don't personally know anyone who is deaf. I do know some basic bsl but only a little bit. I'm not a doctor and Google has been my best friend for this fic

Esteban wandered through the paddock towards the Force India garage, mentally preparing himself to go over the data from that afternoon's practice session. Reviewing the data was never his favourite way to spend an afternoon but he knew it was important going into qualifying tomorrow.

Nodding at a few of the team members heading past him and back towards the hospitality he was struck again by the appreciation that they would get to continue next year. The first half of the year had been filled with uncertainty and it was a good feeling to be able to fully focus on the present season without wondering if the team would even be there next year. Despite not getting along fully with his teammate, he was happy that Checo had been able to step forward and take the necessary steps in order to ensure the team's survival.

Thoughts turning to his new boss, Lawrence, Esteban was overall happy with the business relationship that he had with him. While Lawrence was a keen motor enthusiast, he was also a highly competent businessman which made for a good combination when running a Formula 1 team. He’d only met the man once, at their initial meeting when Lawrence had taken over the team back in August, but it had been productive and both Esteban and Checo had left feeling refreshed and also secure in their seats for another year. One of the first things they’d discussed with Lawrence and Otmar was the extension of their contracts for another year, which considering their line of work was a huge weight removed from the Frenchman’s shoulders.

He’d heard that Lawrence was supposed to be at the GP this weekend, along with one of his children but so far, he hadn’t seen them. After some late-night googling after he learnt about their new owner, Esteban had found out that Lawrence had two children, a boy and girl but there was very little information about them. He was excited to meet them though, according to an old interview they both spoke French and were interested in Motor racing, which in Esteban’s book was enough to know that they’d get along. They'd planned to have dinner that evening so hopefully everything would go well. 

Humming softly as he entered the garage, he glanced around, spotting a few of his mechanics clustered around the screens but couldn’t see his race engineer so he knew he had a few more minutes before the meeting started. Scanning over the rest of the room he spotted a man standing next to his car, back facing Esteban. He was wearing a branded BWT hoodie and his brown curly hair was a mess on top of his head.

Esteban frowned slightly, not recognising the man but decided against speak up figuring he must have had clearance to be in the garage and it's not like he was even doing anything besides just standing there after all. That was until the man reached down into the car itself.

Stepping forward, Esteban called out to the man, “Hey!” eyes narrowing when the man didn’t react.

“Hey!” He called out again, “excuse me!” One of the engineers glanced over at Esteban’s raised voice but didn’t intervene.

Esteban frowned when the man continued to ignore him and when he saw him start to touch the steering wheel, Esteban ran over gripping the man’s shoulder, yanking him around.

“Hey, what do you think you’re doing?” He stated, irritation growing.

The other man flinched heavily, eyes darting around before locking with Esteban’s. Finally able to see his face, Esteban realised he was right in not recognising him. He’d made a point of getting to know his mechanics and team members, and he could safely say that he didn’t know him.

“What were you doing? Didn’t you hear me, you can’t be messing with the car!” Esteban said, pushing the other man’s shoulder slightly to move him away from the car.

The other man staggered slightly from the shove and starting wildly moving his hands around while chewing his lip nervously, an imploring look on his face.

Esteban glanced around the garage, confused by the shorter man’s actions. Catching the eye of one of the mechanics, he gestured at the intruder, stating “who’s this? What is he doing”? Laughing slightly as the other man’s hands gestures began to get a bit more frantic. “Seriously what’s wrong with you”? Esteban said, seeing the man’s face fall from the corner of his eye.

Reaching over the man, grabbed Esteban’s arm, trying to pull his attention back.

Once again Esteban shrugged the hand off his arm and pushed the other man away, slightly harder this time, opening his mouth to speak when another voice called out,

“What is going on in here?”

Freezing, Esteban looked over to see Lawrence enter the garage and make his way over to the two men. This wasn’t the kind of impression he was trying to make when his boss was around, but what shocked him was that Lawrence wasn’t paying him any attention and instead walked straight over to the other man.

“Lance” The older man called out, whilst moving his hands around in a similar manner that the other man – _Lance –_ had been doing. Esteban shifted uneasily as the two men communicated, hands moving quickly, beginning to feel like he’d made a massive mistake in how he’d acted. Lance looked nervous, not meeting Lawrence’s eyes, while Lawrence’s eyes darkened

Lawrence pulled Lance in for a quick hug before rounding on Esteban, “What happened here Esteban?” he questioned. His voice was even, not betraying his feelings, but Esteban could see in Lawrence’s eyes that he wasn’t happy.

“I was just…eh…erm… I didn’t know who he was.” He stuttered, trying to find the best way to phrase what had happened.

“And not knowing who someone is, is an excuse to yell at them and push them?”

Esteban flushed at that, averting his eyes to stare at the ground.

Lawrence sighed, “The least you could do it say sorry.”

At that point, Esteban hoped the ground would open up and swallow him whole. It was like being told off by his dad, but even worse. Sighing slightly, he looked up and noticed that Lance was intensely watching him, the look of pure concentration on his face making Esteban giggle slightly. The smile soon dropped from his face as Lance blushed furiously and looked away.

“Hey” Esteban called out, trying to regain his attention, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have shoved you, I just didn’t know what you were doing with the car.”

Lance frowned as he finished speaking, and he mumbled something before pursing his lips and nodding.

An awkward silence fell on the three men mercifully broken by Brad, Esteban’s race engineer calling over to them that they were ready to start the briefing. Briefly glancing at Lawrence, who nodded Esteban quickly made his way over to his team. When he looked back, he could see Lance hurriedly making his way out of the garage, closely followed by Lawrence. Sighing he put the unusual encounter out of his mind and focused on the data in front of him.

……………………………………………………………………………

Cracking his shoulders, Esteban left his hotel room and headed towards the lift. After a long briefing session, he was almost ready to fall into bed and sleep when he was reminded that both himself and Sergio were supposed to be having dinner with Lawrence that evening. That had been met with groans and half-hearted attempt to get out of it. After what happened in the garage earlier, he was not in a hurry to see his boss again.

He’d also been unable to learn more about Lance, so he planned on asking Lawrence at dinner, and also so he could contact him and apologise better. He was ashamed about how he’d acted earlier and knew that he needed to prove to Lawrence and the team that heard the exchange that he wasn’t normally like that.

Arriving at the lift just as the doors opened, he quickly darted inside, hitting the button for the ground floor. Luckily he was the only one in there so he wouldn’t have to make any awkward small talk.

Soon he was walking into the restaurant and being shown to his table. As they approached he was surprised to see he was early and there was only one other person sat at the table. As they got closer, Esteban couldn’t help the groan that slipped from his throat. It was Lance.

Lance was fiddling with his phone and didn’t look up when Esteban arrived at the table. As the host walked away Esteban was left standing awkwardly next to the table as Lance continued to type on his phone. Clearing his throat and getting no response, Esteban pulled his chair out and sat down, grumbling under his breath. With still no response from the other side of the table, Esteban frowned.

“I know I was a bit of an ass earlier, but I did say sorry,” he stated. Still silence from Lance. Huffing loudly, he flicked his napkin across the table onto Lance’s lap, covering his phone. 

“Come on man, I said I was sorry earlier. It’s just rude.”

Lance jerked his head up as the napkin obscured the view of his phone, face falling slightly when he spotted Esteban sitting opposite him. Brows drawing together, he started gesturing again, similar to what he’d done in the garage earlier.

This time though Esteban could recognise that the movements weren’t sporadic and random but were precise. Groaning loudly, Esteban finally realised what was happening. Lance was using sign language.

Blushing furiously as he realised this, he dropped his head down, smacking it on the table as he buried his face in his hands. _Stupid stupid stupid,_ he thought, _how could he be so dumb._

Hearing a screech, Esteban looked up and saw Lance pushing away his chair, standing up and swiftly walking away from the table.

“Wait,” Esteban called out, “Wait Lance… agh dammit, he’s deaf you moron,” he stated more to himself than anyone else, standing up and starting to head after Lance but stopping when Checo and Lawrence appeared in the doorway.

 _Damn damn damn,_ Esteban thought , _If Lawrence didn’t hate me after earlier, he’s going to now._ Esteban awkwardly walked backwards towards the table wide-eyed, bumping into a waiter in the process, his face burning red, before dropping back into his seat. Gazing at his hands folded in his lap he wonderedbhow he was going to break it to his family that he was being dropped from F1 because he was a dick to his boss’s son.

As the two men reached the table he heard Lawrence clear his throat, causing Esteban to meekly look up, nervously chewing his lip between his teeth. Checo dropped into the seat next to his, raising an eyebrow critically at Esteban who in turn glared back. If there was one thing he didn’t need right now, it was his teammate being irritating.

“Esteban,” Lawrence said, calling his attention back to the man now sat opposite to him, “Esteban” he started again but Esteban jumped in, desperate to try and explain the situation,

“I’m sorry! I’m so so sorry, I didn’t realise that Lance was deaf in the garage earlier and I’m sorry for acting like a dick and I’m sorry for whatever I did now to make him leave. I just” He paused sighing slightly before continuing, “I just…can erm… could you just fire me and get it over with?” Dropping his eyes to his hands again, he picked at his nail as he awaited his fate.

“Esteban,” Lawrence said again, his tone gentler than previously, “Esteban look at me”, he paused waiting for him to comply before continuing, “I’m not going to fire you, pretty sure that I don’t have that power anyway” he stated, chuckling lightly.

“But...”

“But nothing, it’s okay Esteban you apologised for earlier, it wasn't the best I grant you that but it was an apology and what just happened has nothing to do with you.”

“But I… I’m so sorry, I don’t know what was the matter with me, I’m not n..normally like this."

“Esteban, Esteban, It’s okay calm down. This afternoon was just a misunderstanding and he was waiting on a phone call which is why he just left,” Lawrence locked eyes with Esteban a firm look showing in them but his face was calm and gentle, an expression he remembered from his childhood, normally given by his father. “So, if it’s okay with you, let's let the matter rest and get on with dinner hmm?”

Esteban nodded his agreement, lips twitching upwards in a small smile before he turned his attention to the menu on the table in front of him. The conversation turned to the day’s events on track and the performance of the team.

Esteban mostly let the conversation wash over him, joining in with a few remarks here and there but for the most part it was Lawrence and Checo chatting while Esteban continued to dwell on the events of the afternoon. His attention completely on Lance. He couldn’t stop thinking about how he had acted and how he’d caused Lance to have a cute little frown on his face during their interactions and wait what. Esteban’s eyes widened at that thought, _Cute. Huh did he find Lance cute?_ Casting his mind back he recalled Lance’s deep brown eyes, widened in confusion and his overly floppy soft-looking hair falling over his face, _aw damn,_ he realised, _I think Lance is cute._

Sighing heavily over the realisation, mainly because he’d definitely ruined any chance of pursuing any kind of relationship with Lance. The sigh brought Lawrence and Checo’s attention back on him from their discussion.

“You okay?” Checo asked, raising an eyebrow over his teammate’s behaviour.

“Yeah…yeah I’m good, just thinking about tomorrow” he lied.

“Are you sure?” This time the question came from Lawrence, the same concerned look on his face and Esteban sighed again.

“I was just…” he huffed trying to get his thoughts together, “I was just thinking about Lance.” Blushing instantly as he saw Lawrence’s eyebrow raise and a small smile appearing on his face as he gestured for Esteban to continue,

“I was wondering…has he always been deaf?”

Into the silence that followed his question, it was Lawrence who sighed this time. “no not always, it happened when he was 10. Meningitis.”

“I’ve never heard about this” Checo stated, looking between the two, “though honestly I’ve heard much about your family in the first place.”

“I like to keep it that way” Lawrence affirmed, “My wife isn’t a very public person and we made the decision not to raise the kids in the spotlight. That decision was made slightly easier because of Lance.”

Looking intently at Esteban when he spoke, “Lance has been bullied a lot through his childhood, both because of my money and because of his hearing loss. A couple of newspapers got ahold of that information and it made it a lot worse. It was a hard adjustment for everyone and I just want to protect my kids; you know that feeling” he said glancing towards Checo as he said the last bit. Checo nodding furiously in agreement.

Esteban also nodded, but his stomach dropped again thinking about his actions earlier. In his mind, he was no better than the bullies Lance had encountered his entire life. The mood at the table raised a bit after some of the mechanics stopped by to chat with the drivers and team boss.

Eventually, Esteban made his excuses and headed back towards his room. He’d claimed he wanted to look over the data some more and do extra preparations for tomorrow, which he was. But he was also going to learn some sign language so that he could surprise Lance and be able to apologise properly.

After making it back to his room and changing into some worn-out sweats and old Manor racing shirt, Esteban settled onto his bed and opened his laptop. Deciding the best thing to do would be to find a video explaining the basics he headed to youtube, simply typing in _Learn sign language_ and clicking on the first video that popped up.

**_Learn BSL – For beginners_ **

The video started by explaining the signs for individual letters and talking the viewer through the alphabet before moving onto words and phrases. After re-watching the video a few times Esteban moved into the bathroom, standing in front of the mirror and attempted to recreate what he’d seen. After a few attempts, he was somewhat pleased with what he was doing and hoped he’d be able to tell Lance he was sorry.

As he snuggled under the duvet, Esteban felt peaceful for the first time since running into Lance in the garage and fell asleep thinking about deep brown eyes and lithe fingers.

…………………………………………………………………………………….

Heading to the track the next morning, Esteban was nervous. Not only because it was qualifying but because he was hoping to see Lance again and get to apologise for his behaviour. He’d woken up earlier than usual, deciding to use the time to practice more sign language, wanting to be perfect. Sat in the back of the car he quickly ran through the motions again, trying to focus on making the movements defined like the video said. Slow and clear was better than rushed and confusing and Esteban definitely knew he was slow, but hopefully, he’d be able to pick it up faster over time.

As the car pulled up, Esteban thanked the driver and hopped out, greeting his media officer and beginning the walk through the paddock, stopping occasionally to chat to various media companies and other drivers. All thoughts of Lance and sign language soon disappeared from his mind as he started his pre-practice brief and warmups. Before he knew it he was in the garage watching as the mechanics fiddled with the areo of the car, updating the setup and readying the car for when the green light was shown. Glancing around he was disappointed but not surprised that he couldn’t see Lawrence or Lance hanging around, figuring that they would want to stay out of the way, especially since they were close to qualifying.

Getting the nod from his engineer, Esteban shook his head, mentally clearing his mind before climbing into the car and getting settled. _Time to go_.

……………………………………………….

Practice flew by, Esteban felt like he’d only been out five minutes. Pulling into his pit box and being wheeled back into the garage, Esteban could feel that the team was happy with the pace that both himself and Sergio had been showing. Hopefully, if things went their way it could be a good weekend for the team.

After being cleared from his debrief and having a couple of hours to spare before needing to get ready for qualifying, he decided to head to hospitality to grab some food and head back to his drivers’ room. Wanting to get away before he got stuck doing some media interviews Esteban walked quickly across the paddock, nodding at Seb and Kimi going the other way and offering a soft _bonjour_ and wave towards Charles and Pierre but otherwise keeping his head down. He knew he wasn’t overly popular with some of the drivers on the grid and had decided long ago it was in his best interest to try and keep a low profile where he could. It was lonely but helped with the ruthlessness of a sport where your seat wasn't always secure from one year to the next.

Pushing open the hospitality doors and he greeted some of the personnel running around, aiming to be in and out before he got pulled into a conversation but as he turned a corner he bumped into a shorter man dressed in team colours. Reaching out to steady the man he muttered an apology before gasping as he realised who it was.

Lance.

Gaping slightly at the other man who attempted to push past, Esteban grabbed Lance’s arm to hold him in place using his other hand to show a finger, trying to ask for a minute. Lance pulled away from his touch looking wary but stayed and gestured towards Esteban to continue.

Taking a deep breath, Esteban waved his hand hello, before showing a thumbs up and touching his chin with two fingers, " _Hello, Good afternoon."_

Lance hadn’t run away yet, which Esteban counted as a plus so he kept going, using all his focus to remember what he had practised and to try not to get distracted by Lance.

Using his thumb, he drew a semi-circle under his chin, then brought his two index fingers together and pointing at Lance, " _Nice to meet you."_ Using two fingers he saluted from his forehead, bringing the fingers down towards his chest pointing at himself. After this he paused, this was potentially the hardest part, finger-spelling his name, _"my name is e-s-t-e-b-a-n."_ It was a bit painstaking and he was sure it hadn’t come out completely right but hopefully, it was close enough.

During the last part of his introduction, Lance had begun to frown, eyes moving from Esteban’s hands to his face and back again as if trying to work something out, creases developing in between his eyes. Noting the change in facial expression Esteban decided to just move onto the last part of his speech, if you could call it that, hoping that Lance was simply confused as to why he was introducing himself again. The last part, the sign for sorry, was fairly easy - a circular motion over his chest.

Grinning as he finished, quite proud of the fact that he’d managed to remember everything, he regarded the younger Canadian, smile falling away when he realised that Lance was just awkwardly watching him, a confused look on his face.

Time seemed to drag out as the two simply looked at each other, Esteban beginning to grow more and more uneasy, shifting back and forth on his heels, gradually losing the confidence he had felt only minutes earlier. Eventually, the silence was broken, but not in the way Esteban expected.

“I’m sorry” Lance stated, it was ever so slightly slurred and quiet but understandable, “I don't know what you're signing.” He still looked confused but also apologetic, his bushy eyebrows knitted together but eyes soft and sorrowful.

“I..i..ugh..but” Esteban stuttered, uselessly waving his hands around a little, before sighing deeply and crossing them in front of his chest. “But I learnt BSL, I don’t get it?” he stated not really looking for an answer, just confused himself.

Lance’s face lit up a little as he worked out what Esteban had said and opened his mouth as if to speak but before he could he was interrupted by the phone in his hand vibrating. Esteban could see that it was a skype call and stepped backwards gesturing towards the phone, indicating that Lance should answer it. Lance himself looked conflicted, but accepted the phone, grinning at whoever was on the other end.

Esteban took the opportunity and quickly turned, speed walking around the corner and away from Lance. Stopping, he sagged against the wall, gently smacking his head, _Merde, you’re such an idiot,_ he thought. Peaking back around the corner he spotted Lance heading towards the offices at the other end of the hospitality, his stomach sinking at the sight. Somehow even despite his best attempt he still hadn’t been able to connect with the other man. He was so focused on Lance’s disappearing form, eyes definitely not focused on his perfect bum.. _no no, I'm not going there_ he thought, that he didn't hear the footsteps coming up behind him.

“What on earth are you doing?” Checo questioned, the sudden voice startling Esteban causing him to jump and stumble. Although his teammate reached out to steady him, Esteban swiftly righted himself and sidestepped the hands. “I...uh...nothing, I wasn’t doing anything wrong” He replied indignantly, once again crossing his arms in front of his chest.

Sergio quirked an eyebrow, holding his hands out in a placating manner, “I didn’t say you were doing something wrong, but trying to sneakily look around corners is odd.”

“It's not odd” he protested, “I was just…”

“Seeing if Lance was running away from that lovely awkward looking conversation, in which case, yes he was” Checo interrupted, a small smile appearing on his face as he took in Esteban’s growing embarrassment.

“You, ah, you saw that?” It was mostly a rhetorical question, Esteban averting his eyes, so he didn’t have to see his teammate gloating.

“I caught the end, and I think I know what the problem was” he stated, causing Esteban’s head to snap back up, locking eyes with the other man. “You said you leant BSL right?”, pausing for Esteban’s nod in confirmation, “well that’s the issue, Lance doesn’t understand BSL.”

“But its sign language, how can he not understand me, I didn’t think I was doing it that badly."

“eh sure if you say so, but you do realise there’s more than one version of sign language right?"

“There’s…wait what!”

Checo laughed at his teammate's surprise, “yeah most countries have their own variation but I guess you can say there's two main ones. British sign language, BSL, and American sign language, ASL, I imagine because Lance is Canadian, he knows ASL and not BSL.”

“Merde” Esteban swore, running his hand through his hair, “wait, why do you know that?”

“Google” Checo replied.

Esteban’s brows drew together in confusion but gave a little shake of the head, dismissing his desire to ask his teammate more and moving on instead, “So I have to learn ASL and the Lance will be able to understand me?”

Checo nodded his affirmation, “Shouldn’t be too hard, it's different sure but you’ve already got used to the hand movements.”

Esteban looked at his teammate slightly wide eyes, a look of disbelief shining through, “Thank you Checo”, he said earnestly. In return the other man just waved it off, “eh don’t worry about it man, though maybe you can give me a tow later on eh?”

The pair chuckled slightly, Checo reaching out to clasp Esteban’s shoulder giving it a comforting squeeze before heading off. After watching his teammate disappear through the same doors that Lance had only minutes prior, Esteban pulled out his phone to check the time, grinning when he saw that he still had time to eat and grab a quick nap despite the unscheduled encounters. Unfortunately, another conversation with Lance would probably have to wait until tomorrow as he wouldn’t have time to learn ASL until that evening due to the qualifying and long debrief that would follow.

All he could hope was that Lance would be understanding when he was able to explain what had happened and with any luck, he’d be able to leave his embarrassment behind when they left the US.

Luckily all thoughts of his embarrassment were cleared due to the mental demands of the sport. There was no room in the car for worrying about making a fool himself in front of a crush and he only got a chance to think over the conversations with Lance and Sergio once he was back at his hotel that night. The pace that they’d shown during practice had transferred over to qualifying, both himself and Sergio being able to make it through to Q3, set good times and qualify in good positions. If all went well tomorrow it would be a good point haul for the team.

Learning ASL, not matter what Checo had reassured, was not easy. Having already learnt many of the simple phrases it was difficult to adjust and remember the differences. It had taken most of his evening to get to a level where he felt confident enough that he’d be able to explain himself to Lance and attempt to hold a conversation with the Canadian.

Once again as he drifted to sleep his mind was filled with thoughts of the other man. And once again he managed a restful nights sleep, the nerves falling away as he dreamed of Lance supporting him from the garage and Lance showing him just how happy he was for Esteban once they were away from prying eyes..... 

……………………………………………………………..

Heading out of the garage after the race, Esteban was conflicted. The race pace of the car had been good with Esteban finishing eighth and Sergio following in ninth but after crossing the line he’d been informed by the team that they were under investigation for exceeding fuel limits on the first lap. At the moment his result still held but the investigation wouldn’t take too long and was more of a formality at this point. The FIA and the team had been able to see the fuel in the telemetry so there was no hiding from the truth. The FIA would probably announce the results later that evening so luckily, he was able to do media duty without having to comment on a penalty or a disqualification. Unluckily, that was all the media wanted to talk about and by the time he was done he was in a foul mood.

Although he looked calm on the outside as he walked towards the Force India hospitality, on the inside he was seething. Taking advantage of his height he took long-legged strides aiming to get himself out of public view as fast as he could. He sped up slightly as he spotted more reporters hanging around outside the hospitality doors, but forced himself to smile at the camera’s, giving a small wave as well. He was certain the smile looked more like a grimace than a true grin, but he was past caring. It was a stupid mistake that had been made and it was more than likely he was going to lose his points, hurting the team as a whole.

Once he was inside the building, he let the smile fall from his face, a frown replacing it, breathing out a small sigh as he headed back towards his driver room, his head down as to avoid any unwanted conversations. Reaching the corridor, he startled when he spotted someone coming the other way, he’d expected many of the personnel to still be in the garage.

He came to a stop when he realised it was Lance, the other man giving a shy wave when they locked eyes. Esteban returned it, breaking the eye contact and looking at a point somewhere over Lance's shoulder, the feeling of embarrassment flooding back in that moment. However, the feeling was quickly replaced by one of excitement as he exclaimed: “wait I know the right language now!”

The bewildered look on Lance’s face, caused Esteban to release a genuine giggle, helping to lift his mood and making him forget about the impending penalty. Hearing voices behind him he quickly stepped forward, opening the door to his room with one hand and grabbing Lance’s hand with the other, pulling him into the room behind him.

As the door shut with a soft click, Esteban felt a small squeeze and looked down at their still joined hands, feeling a little swooping in his stomach as Lance gently stroked his thumb over Esteban’s knuckles. Forcing his eyes back to Lance’s face, his heart skipped a beat, mouth going dry at the soft look he saw in the other man’s eyes. He swallowed heavily as he straightened up, reluctantly pulling his hand from Lance’s signing a quick hello, mouth quirking upwards when Lance returned the gesture.

Similar to his attempts from the previous day he took his fist and rubbed it in a circular motion over his chest, signing “sorry” before introducing himself. Placing his right hand over his chest and then holding his index and middle fingers of each hand together, tapping them against the other hand before switching to finger-spelling for ‘Esteban.’ 

He fumbled a few times accidentally slipping back into BSL, throwing his arms up in frustration causing Lance to snicker, attempting to hide his smirk behind his hand.

By the time he was finished, Esteban’s jaw was aching from how much he’d been smiling and Lance’s shy grin that he’d tried to hide had made way for a large smile as well, eyes lit up in cautious hope. Esteban’s eyes were drawn to Lance’s and he saw that he was blinking heavily, the sides of his eyes wet with unshed tears. Despite his best attempts a few stray tears escaped and marked trails down his cheeks.

Unconsciously Esteban reached out to wipe some away catching himself before he made contact, hand lingering in-between the two men. Shifting his weight from side to side, he ran a hand through his hair causing the already messy hair to stand up, as the two simply looked at each other. Lance reached out and intertwined their hands, giving a reassuring squeeze. Emboldened by the actions of the other man Esteban reached out with his free hand and brushed his thumb under Lance’s eye, wiping away a few tears.

Blushing heavily Lance glanced around the room, rubbing the back of his head with his free hand before gently tugging on Esteban’s hand and moving towards the small settee in the corner of the room. Dropping into it Lance pulled on their joined hands urging the French man to join him. As Esteban settled into the cushions Lance untangled their hands, leaning back and stretching his legs so he could get into his jeans pocket. Pulling out his phone he opened the notes app, typing “ _I think it'll be easier like this”,_ a cheeky grin on his face before switching to the contacts app, handing Esteban the phone so he could enter his number.

Huffing Esteban, quickly entered his details, sending himself a text so he had Lance’s number. “I thought I was doing alright” he muttered as he grabbed his phone from the table. Turning back to Lance, he noticed that he now had a frown on his face, “what’s up?” he queried.

Lance nodded slightly, fingers flying across the screen as he typed. A second later his phone pinged, ‘ _I could see you were talking but since you weren’t looking, I couldn’t read it’_

“ahhh sorry” he replied, “I said I thought my sign language wasn’t that bad” he repeated this time making an effort to enunciate his words causing Lance to giggle, “sorry” he managed, little snorts breaking free despite his attempts to smoother them, ' _s_ _orry you just look weird now.'_ At the look on Esteban’s face, Lance let out a full belly laugh throwing his head back in the process.

“Just be normal, it’s okay” he stated once he’d calmed down a little. Esteban realised at that moment that he loved Lance's voice and the more he heard the more he fell in love with it. His tone was soft and although the enunciation wasn’t perfect and it was a little monotone, to him it was perfect.

“Why were you crying earlier?” he asked. Lance pursed his lips slightly, eyebrows dragging down into a crease as he re-opened his phone, silently typing away for a minute.

_‘No one’s ever tried to learn ASL for me before, at least no one outside my family. Even if you got a bit muddled at first, It’s sweet and it means a lot.’_

Finishing reading the text, Esteban glanced up seeing a guarded but also quietly optimistic look in Lance’s face. Deciding to type his reply to make sure he made himself clear, Esteban held up a finger before gathering his thoughts and typing,

_‘I felt bad about how I acted in the garage, I’m sorry but I know that doesn’t excuse it. I wanted to say sorry properly, so I looked on YouTube, but I didn’t realise that BSL and ASL were different.’_

_“I guess I'll have to teach you then,_ " Lance typed back.

_"I guess you will."_

Suddenly lances face lit up and he excitedly signed, "now", rolling his eyes at Esteban's confusion and typing it out as well. 

At Esteban's nod, he began by pointing directly to his chest with one finger and then held bent handshapes a few inches away from his chest, motioning backwards and forwards and then tapping his index fingers together. Typing out ' _I have to'_ and repeating the movements and gesturing for Esteban to try it. After a few minor corrections Esteban was getting it right he clapped, giving him a thumbs up. 

Moving on, Lance held his fingers to his thumbs on either side of his head and moved them backwards and forwards before pointing at Esteban with one hand. ' _teach you_ ' he typed out and repeated the process until Esteban could confidently sign the phrase. 

Happily clapping, "that's good" Lance signed, giving Esteban a thumbs up to emphasis it. 

Feeling bold, Esteban typed " _how do you say, 'I think you're cute?"._ Sitting back and watching as Lance's cheeks flushed when he read it, eyes lifting to meet Esteban's, tongue flicking out to wet his lips. Just as Lance opened his mouth Esteban suddenly yawned loudly, jaw cracking with the force.

His bodies way of reminding him that he’d just competed in a two hours long race, and he was suddenly aware he hadn’t even changed from his race suit. Blushing he glanced at Lance who typed, _“I think I should leave you to it"_ an understanding look on his face. 

Nodding, Esteban quickly typed out another message, _‘Sadly yes but how about I text you later and we can chat some more in the hotel?’"_

Giving a warm smile and a thumbs up, Lance stood up, tugging Esteban in for a hug, briefly resting his head on the taller man’s shoulder before pulling away. He gave a passing wave before heading out of the room.

For a second Esteban was frozen in the middle of the room, a soft smile on his face. And then the moment was broken by a knock on the door. Dan poked his head in as he knocked, “You decent? Awesome let’s get your muscles sorted out and then its debrief time” he stated, already moving around the room prepping the massage table. In his hand he felt his phone buzz, swiping it open to see another message from Lance,

_"Maybe if you're good, we can work on how to flirt in asl X."_

**Author's Note:**

> Like I said at the start I'm not deaf and don't have any personal experience - if anything is wrong or needs fixing please please let me know so I can change it! 
> 
> Lance's deafness came from bacterial meningitis which causes sensorineural deafness, which happens when the infection spreads to the cochlea. Approximately 1 in 10 children will experience deafness as a result of meningitis.  
> As Lance was 10 when he lost his hearing he still has the memory of what talking sounds like so that's why he talks a little in this. I've read that it's like not using any language - over time you forget it but I've also read that some deaf people chose to have speech therapy to keep using their voice. (I've goggled a looot for this)  
> When I originally goggled sign language the first one in my YouTube was bsl sooo I guess it works 
> 
> I do have a couple other ideas to make this into a series (I've got a half finished Brazil 2018 fic) if anyone is remotely interested in reading it I'd love to hear.  
> Massive creds to [bonotje](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bonotje/pseuds/bonotje) for helping me with a couple of amazing resources! 
> 
> I'm on tumblr as [fireessie](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/fireessie) come say hi 😊


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